I'm someone you keep wrapped up tight.
the best kept secret.
because, "I'm just not ready yet."
because I'm just not steady yet.
And then he's in town
weighing his options.
Deciding if my thread
count is worth all the drama.
because, "I'm just don't want that yet."
because I'm just not the one where you place bets.
I swirl sniff sip whiskey with his
head in my lap.
while he traces tattoo lines
and pretends for a moment
that I am the one.
I could be the one.
But the fuzziness causes distraction.
because, "I don't have the time"
because I was never good at pretending I'm fine.
Walk me down the hall and smooth out the sheets.
Run your fingers over hip bones.
Tell me I'm a tempest in a teacup.
Put your head in my neck to help you sleep.
because, "He said you're a keeper."
because I was never what you wanted anyway.
and if you need some quiet time
to process all those decisions you made
take time to make time to navigate the fine lines.
watch for the flicker, be mindful of where the bombs are laid.
The map got lost in the move, anyway.